Are you a mother of a teenage girl that makes you concerned and worried? Well, welcome to the club! It has always been said that the communication process between a parent and a child is a difficult one. While every mother tries to be a role model for her daughter, it takes more than just good intentions to get through the complex mind of a teenager. Mums need to be able to provide support and understanding, and help their daughters as they figure out their goals and path in life.
Mum, I’m here to tell you to never ever question your daughter’s potential! You just can’t! After all, you are a mother and you don’t want her freaking out or misunderstanding what you’re trying to tell her. Instead, sit beside her and talk to her. Listen, like her best friend. It’s important that she lets you know the problems she encounters. If she does, do your best to help her get through them. It’s not easy growing up in Hong Kong, and girls are under a great deal of pressure, so mums, here are a few ways you can help:
1. Praise works as a miracle. You can’t imagine how productive it will be if you give positive feedback to her efforts. Let her make her own way, though you can teach her to set high goals and to work hard in order to achieve them.
2. Help her avoid the influences of social pressure and peer pressure. Self-esteem is key, so always boost her self-confidence and don’t let her lose her sense of identity.
3. Steer her towards appropriate classes. Identify what she does best, regardless of what it is. Every child has his or her own area of expertise. Help your daughter find her interests and build on them.
4. Keep your expectations realistic. Every parent wants their child to grow up to be ultra-successful, but that can put an enormous amount of pressure on our kids, especially during their teenage years. Be patient, love her for what she does and inspire her towards her goals.
5. Resist the temptation to lecture. This can be a hard one, I know! Though we can have the best intentions in mind, harsh lectures can push our kids to lash out and rebel. Instead, try to be supportive and enthusiastic, and act as a positive influence as much as possible.
6. Spend more time with her as a friend. Often times, we need to let our mum guard down and get on our kids’ level in order to relate to them and be approachable so they can open up to us. This includes just spending some fun time together, visiting places you’ve never been before in Hong Kong and sparking up a conversation organically.
Finally, remember that communication is a process and it’s not always an easy one. Be patient with yourself and your teenager. Imagine her potential and encourage her to keep her goals and dreams in mind when days get tough. Take some deep breaths and realise your little girl is becoming a woman. She may not have found her footing in life yet, but she will get there sooner than you know it!
For more great tips on helping your daughter reach her full potential, check out “Imagine Potential, A Life Coaching Guide to Success for Girls” – available on Amazon.com here.